I blame Chrétien, that wily old Canuck,
For forcing me to leave my natal land.
The moment of my triumph’s when he struck,
That Third World bum, the flames of envy fanned.
I blame Canadians, clangorous and weak,
Jealous of my grandiose success.
Medicare! High taxes! Oh, how bleak!
Addicted to their socialistic mess.
I blame Dave Radler, oily little snake;
That judge, self-righteous, pusillanimous;
The state DA, a pious little fake;
Revengeful journos, kicking up a fuss.
In short, though they all found me in default,
It all comes down to this: it’s not my fault!
This, er, post also appears on rabble.ca.